Derpfestor

Can't you let little Sylvie have a barber, even just a brief one, so I won't have to endure Eloisa's wrath next time she saunters into my club all on her lonesome. She takes these things so personally, as you must know.

By the Holy Mary, if not, then I know enough for the both of us. You and I, Signorina Mun... The things we've seen, sì?

Are you hanging around here in the hopes of a little peek into my privates? There are terms you have to meet, of course, to gain access - you know that as well. You must carry a torch and the one you're burning for must be, at the very least, as daisy as you - not to mention, a dame. Otherwise, it's a no, capisci, you got to dangle.

I can't just let anyone in who asks to see my sitting rooms. Too crowded, Signorina. We like to sit on the laps of friends and family, you understand, nice gals, not all those hinky goons.

So, if you want to look inside, tell me who you love and if you love the right one, it'll be your ducat.

Name and shame, Signorina. Name and shame.